Your Momma Jokes Novels & Stories

mom said half jokingly and half seriously. "Don't worry mom I'll keep snow in check.And ooh I better go get ready he comes ."I said going upstairs when I heard mom say"it's a they not a he."I stopped in my tracks when I heard that."what the Fuck mom? how many men are you engaged to?"I blurted out as mom started laughing."these isn't funny mom."I said giving mom an am not joking look "oh dear,am only marrying one man and his is coming with his son.you're gonna a big brother baby."mom literally squiered.i just stared at her just dumbfounded at what she just said

my mom said sarcastically, rolling her hazel brown eyes. "Boy, you roll your eyes way too much mom," I said trying my best not to roll my eyes and keep my lips from twitching into a smile. "Well, it's a contagious disease," she smiled. Pft! I rolled my eyes. She chuckled and I felt myself hiding back a laugh myself. This lady really knows how to lighten the mood. "Point taken," I said folding my hands across my chest and sat across from her on my loveseat. "Very well. Now that we have got that out of the way, we can get down to business," my mom paused for effect. I raised a dark eyebrow at her. "As you know, the Black Diamonds Pack were planned to come here, but-"

"Don't you 'mom' me. What did you do to her? You better go fix this now, or I'm telling your dad this instant." "Dad's not home," I replied, confident that she couldn't harm me that way. Dad went out with a few old friends for the day. He said something about fishing, but knowing my dad, he and his so called 'friends' would take a jet to go fishing. Mom laughed hysterically, and I found the scene quite charming. Did I miss the joke? What was so funny that mom would be in such hysterics? When her laughter finally died down, she looked me directly in my eyes, and said, "Your dad's upstairs."

I said with a sarcastic smirk. "Okay Ginger, sheesh!" exclaimed Jody as she moved over and started sucking on her mum's boobs. "That's a good girl, Jody, suck on mummy's boobies. Do you like that honey?" she asked her husband. "Oh yes, very much dear but I hope there is more to cum," said Jody's dad. "I'm sure there is lot's more to CUM," said her mum with a giggle and moan as Jody moved lower to her pussy lips and started licking.

I confessed moaning. "Your mama raised you well, that I'm definitely sure of," Jackson said moaning and hardly catching his breath. "My mom was a better whore than I am, I am sure she is the best sex tutorial lecturer ever," I admitted honestly to Jackson. "Okay, start riding on my dick softly but be careful of my fibula, they are silently freaking out too," Jackson said jokingly. "Yeah," I swiftly replied to Jackson.

Standing infront of Laura, breakdancing in her apron Maddie whisper yelled at her “Lulu it’s just few seconds past 6pm. Come on!. Girlll I’m trying to be your support system here” But Laura’s mood wasn’t having any of it. “Laura get up!” Maddie grumbled. “You’re not my mum now are you?” “Well, you don’t have one so I may as well double as your cousin and mother!” She fired back jokingly. Laura couldn’t stop herself from laughing as she gave Maddie the—oh really?— look. The joke is an old one and it always does the magic in getting Laura loosened up. “Come on now Lulu” She spoke with a mischievous grin.

She tilts her head and leans closer. "Either you're pregnant or acquired a second heart," her words are whispered quietly enough so no one but I can hear. I laugh loudly, and everyone turns. Crap. "Mum was telling me a joke," I lie. "What joke? She can't do jokes," my dad laughs, and Darius nods in agreement. "It wasn't a joke, that's why. She just laughed at something I said," my mum mutters and turns to me. Everyone goes back to their conversations now. "Storm, it wasn't a joke," she mutters.

my father said while trying to stifle his laughter. "Yeah. You sounded really convincing, honey. I was about to sedate you with nitrous oxide if you hadn't stopped. Ha ha ha!" mom joined in on the conversation with another one of her dentist jokes. The laughing gas joke being one of her particular favorites. "It was a joke? Whew! You had me going there for a while," I took a deep breath before I continued, "So you're not mad that I just got home now?" "Of course not! You already told us that you were coming home late. Besides, we trust you completely sweetheart," dad answered.

My mom greeted with a blooming smile which was fun to see from her but then I hated that she even called me son right in front of this young guy who she just fucked. “Shit, you ‘bout to catch a flight?” The guy named Jackson asked when he saw my mom in this tight jeans. “Huh?” My mom appeared to be confused. “Cause that apple bottom makes me wanna take a bite!!” “Oh, you silly, silly boy.” My mother, a woman in her forty’s jumped on the guy who physically looked like he’s just five years older than me. Is my mom even okay? I know she still got those pot smokes in her head, maybe some coke powders too but that Jackson guy could be her son.

Mom says, closing the door behind Maggie, and turning towards me with a big smile on her lips. "Well, young man." She says, walking towards me. "So, you and Maggie, huh?" "Yes ma'am." I answer, smiling back at her. "I couldn't help myself." I answer. "So now you've fucked the mother and the daughter." She says, wrinkling her brow as another thought hits her. "Just like at home!" She exclaims. "You are one busy mother fucker." She says, laughing at her own joke, as she pulls me into a tight embrace.