I Feel That My Father Seldom Novels & Stories

People stared at me as I speak and some of them even smiled. “Nung namatay si Mommy kami nalang dalawa ang natira, I thought that we will be fine. But growing up, even though I had the money in the world that my father provided for me, there’s something missing as always. And soon after I realize it was my Dad, his always busy doing work and also doing things that could eventually hurt me.” I painfully said.

No one will never understand me dahil hindi nila alam kung anong pinagdaanan ko. Lumapit sa akin si Lolo Seiji at dahan dahan akong niyakap like how my father used to do. I missed him. I missed him so much. "P-paano k-kapag hindi ko nanaman po n-nagawa, Lolo?! For how long I will try?"

"I was with my friend." Liar! Gusto kong isigaw sa mukha ni mommy. Subalit hindi na lang ako nagsalita because daddy was fast approaching us. Ayaw kong sumama ang loob niya dahil may sakit siya sa puso. I can't afford to lose the man who sacrificed his life for me. I love my daddy so much. Hindi ko gustong makita siyang nasasaktan. Lalong hindi ko gustong masira ang buhay niya dahil sa katotohanan na alam ko. "Hijo, bakit hindi ka nagpakita sa akin noong isang gabi? What time did you leave the house?" Dad asked.

And it was my father, still in his business suit. Agad akong nag iwas ng tingin dito. It’s been days since I last saw him. Lagi na lang siyang wala. Kung hindi busy sa trabaho ay nasa business trip naman. He’s always like that since I came here to visit. At ngayon na mag-i-stay na ako rito for good ay parang lalo lang lumala iyon. “Hey, are you busy?” pagsisimula nito.

Instead, Rufus—my younger brother is more closer to them kaya hindi ako sanay na ipinapakita kung ano man ang nararamdaman ko. Wala namang problem sa akin ‘yon. Sadyang tahimik lang ako but they never failed to feel how they love me, especially my mother who’s always gentle to me and my brother. While my father? Well, he is cold and I am not close to him—we’re almost not talking. “Just so you know, we want to meet her as soon as possible. So… is she a she-wolf?” I was stunned for a second because of my father’s question.

he asked. I smiled sadly. "It's just that... my father never smiled at me like how he did while talking to Mathieu earlier... Sounds odd, but... it just kinda made me feel insecure..." "Hey, don't feel that way. You'll get to talk to your father later, anyway. May dinner kayo later, diba? I'm sure everything would go fine." he put his hand on my shoulder after. I gave Troy another smile. "Thanks. I hope so, too."

Pakiramdam ko nga mas lalo pa siyang nainis sa nangyari. “I don’t think so, Kyle.” malungkot na saad ko. As far as I know, my father is very hard to please. He has always been that way. Strict, stubborn, and unwilling to bend, no matter how much you try to reason with him. Kahit ako, bilang anak niya, nahihirapan pa rin akong makipag-usap sa kanya nang hindi nauuwi sa pagtatalo. There were moments when I tried to understand him, to meet him halfway, but it was never easy. It feels like no matter what I do, it is never enough to satisfy him.

“What?” “Your father is curious too.” Now that… That was unusual. My father rarely involved himself in my personal life. “Why?” I asked. “Because you look different.” I frowned slightly. “Different how?” “Interested.” The word hung in the air between us. “And that,” my mother added quietly, “doesn’t happen often with you.” She wasn’t wrong. I leaned back in my chair again, staring at the skyline outside. “Mom.” “Yes?” “You’re moving too fast.”

“Ikaw naman, kamusta kayo ng family mo? Close ka ba sa kanila?” Huminto siya. Nag-isip. “Komplikado eh.” “Paanong komplikado?” “Emotionally absent din naman sila In a different way.” Hinawakan niya ko sa kamay at hinila para umupo kami sa sofa. “Yung father ko, he’s always working. Building the business. Making deals. Growing the empire.” “So malungkot ka rin?” “Sometimes. Hindi naman always.” Ngumiti siya nang bahagya. “I have good memories too. With my dad.”

I expect you to be here, be early and don't make the food wait for you. Umirap ako. He can't even say Hi or ask me if I'm doing fine. "Yes, Father." I said coldly. He ended the call after that and didn't even say "okay, goodbye." "Freakin' cold, I think I need a jacket." I said to myself and laugh like an idiot. That's my father, cool right? So fucking cool it makes me freeze to death.