Kenapa Hidupku Seperti Ini Novels & Stories

I just don’t know what to feel. Am I too selfish to think I don’t like it? That it wasn't the one I wanted to do. Okay, I don’t know what to do but I felt there’s something to do, not that. We can still make another plan. I mean, there’s always a plan b, right? Wait, I don’t know. I'm confused. I cannot think straight. Why, why does all this have to happen? Why just can't we be normal like other people? Why can't we stay human, live like humans, grow old together, die, and be reincarnated again?

Mate less, disgusting, and unworthy of love. Why am I born this way? Why am I tormented just for living the life that is given to me? Why did they save me?!

Nothing I attempt is working. All of a sudden everything came to an abrupt halt. Goosebumps laced my body as I wrapped my arms protectively around myself rocking back and forth. I can’t do this. I can’t keep living this way. There is no life for me here. What exactly do I have to live for? I can’t have a perfect love life nor can I live a normal life. Everyone knows how I got rejected and the debt my father is in. Not to forget the old man that I have been condemned to be with for the rest of my life.

As if… As if I can feel how things would go. Shit… Did the other me felt this way too? Did they also experience things like this? But… but why? Why must this thing happen to us? Did we just live to recreate the things that happened before? What bullshit even is this? I… I just don’t understand! Why?!! Why… I want to know why… Because I am not really sure what the meaning is of living if life would just be like this…

Kaya lang naisip ko rin na bigyang pagkakataon ang aking sarili na maranasan ang ganitong uri ng buhay. Iyong hindi lamang puro sa aking kinabukasan ang iniisip kung hindi ay ang tungkol sa mga bagay na pino-problema rin ng karamihan na kagaya nito. I wanted to experience on how to be a normal person. Normal in terms of different aspects including the lifestyle. Like experiencing on going to a club or bar hopping, partying and such. I wanted to experience those. The things I haven't done before.

my life has gotten much worse! Not a day I have had a relaxing time at home....house does not feels like home all I wanna do is end my college and leave this hell hole! For once....why can't I live a normal happy life....why does all the problems surrounds me only....as if I don't have enough in my hands and now this Neil problem too I have to face..... Fuck my life! ×××××××××××××××××××× ¶2 months after¶

I was also not in situation. Why am I even alive?? Why allah didn't took me instead of her?? Why?? Why?? Why?? My life became a hell after she left us. I am dieing every moment. Mom says that allah chooses good things for good people and bad things for bad people. Am I that bad?? Don't I deserve happiness?? I also want to live my life normally. Bohot akela kar diya hai Mere apno ne mujhe. Samajh nahi aata main bura hu

"I don't know what I have done wrong for me to experience this kind of... things. It's all their fault. The number one toxic people. Those two bitches who suddenly cam to our lives and ruined everything that's perfect. We were so perfect back then. Clenching the grass in my hands, I looked down. "Why... Why does it have to be me? I just can't understand the reason of this..." Shit... I deeply sighed. Feeling down, I glanced up at the sky and smiles a bit before biting my lips. "This... I don't think I deserve this... I just want a happy and peaceful life. I just want to have friends. I want a family. My family and my own family... Like a normal person who doesn't need to think about her safe

I voiced out loudly. I didn't mean to raise my voice, but I was angry at myself, at everything. Why is my life just messed up ? Why did my mum leave me when I need her the most. Why is life so unfair? Why is it so unfair to me most especially. "How would you be able to face everyone around you? would you be comfortable telling your friends, your Wife is deaf? I've never even met any of your friends Kene " I said whispering the last part.

Can someone please wake me up when everything's fine? Who would enjoy a life where problems come one after another? I am just trying to survive. I am just trying to change my fate, but what are all these? "Haa…" I'm tired…