ดอกไม้ของพ่อเลี้ยง

Stocking shelves has become my solace, it's become the one break I get away from home.

"Indi hun can I speck with you in my office please"

Here it comes, I knew it was only a matter of time before he found out I was working behind his back and would somehow get his claws in the manager so my checks were turned over to him.

I take a deep breath before stepping into the office, closing the door behind me.

"I'm sorry Indi but I just can't have you around the shop like this"

"I understand, thank you for allowing me to work for this long" I say feeling defeated.

"Don't be a stranger gun" I give her a smile, give a quick wave to the work friends I'd made and head out the shop door.

'You'll bounce back kid' I hear Jet say in my head as I hurry home.

There are times that I'd wished I would have ended my life.

That wouldn't have solved anything, I know that for a fact, it's just well for me it probably would have.

He would have found someway to bring me back just to kill me himself if I were to take away that satisfaction.

The bruises from last week are still somewhat visible across my back and thighs and the stitches I had to have were taken out yesterday leaving me with yet another pale red scar along my right hip-bone.

It's because of said faded bruises that I used to have on my face that I lost a cash paying job today.

I ask myself everyday why I'm still here and why I stay. Take today for example he was sweet and kind even made me breakfast this morning before he started getting ready for work.

I was washing the dishes while he was changing and like the flip of a switch he became his same old self.

He became the abusive asshole I've come to know all to well over the last year or so and have come to hate just as much as I once loved him.

"Fucking hell Indigo your so fucking worthless, I sware" I felt the slap and familiar sting of his hand before I could even sense him behind me.

Normally I would have been on guard and steady enough to take the hit with out falling but this time he was quicker and I went down quickly, shattering the dish I was washing when I fell.

"Fucking worthless" he grumbled as he walked out the front door, leaving me stunned, bleeding and wondering what I had done this time.

Nothing, I'd done nothing, like usual.

Hearing the sound of his keys clank against the front door followed by the click of the lock in the silent apartment made me fear what it might bring.

I was always afraid when ever it came to him coming home because I never knew what side of him would be coming home or at what time.

I myself had just gotten home not to long ago and was now standing by the kitchen counter with a freshly made cup of mint tea when my fearful wide eyes watched him walk through the door with his once handsome face set in a hard glare.

"You" he says pointing directly at me while he marches across the living space towards me.

"You're nothing but a worthless piece of shit you know that" he growls out aggressively grabbing my right arm spilling the contents of my cup all over my arm.

The burn from the hot tea is nothing compared to what's to come only this time I have know idea why he's angry, then again I rarely ever truly know why.

He lets me go with a hard shove to one side and I catch my balance on the counter as I stand awaiting what's to come.

He stands in front of me pinching the bridge of his nose as if stuck in thought or calming himself down.

Then just as I flinch from his sudden movement he all of a sudden turns around and starts walking back over to his backpack, the very backpack he flung to the hard wood floor when he walking into the apartment.

He scoops in up and starts rummaging through it then takes out his phone, he looks down at it then throws it across the room right at my head.

"I told you to fucking charge it" he bite's out.

"I'm sorry" I say taking a few steps back as he takes one forward, all that's about to happen is because I forgot to charge his phone.