Stupid Pick Up Lines Novels & Stories

"I love hugging pretty girls." When Verda saw that I wasn't hurt, her eyes filled with frantic hope. "Hey, pick-me! I… I mean, Cheryl, please help me. My family's rich. I can give you anything as long as you help me survive this!" I raised a finger and wagged it lightly. "Girl, you've got me all wrong. I'm a pick‑me, not a gold digger. Money doesn't tempt me at all!" I stepped aside politely, ready to let karma do its work.

They both caressed their arms, and crept out. “That was so creepy,” Slyvester commented. “You don’t like pick-up lines too?” Ryan asked. “NEVER,” he answered right away. “I mean, there’s a lot of ways to make your partner happy. I don’t need to spell it out. But as for me, I can make my partner giddy and excited even without those f*cking pick-up lines.” “How arrogant. You sound like an expert. Wonder if that’s true.” “Why don’t you try it?”

‘Huh? Alex – ‘I am working on my pick-up lines. How is this?’ ‘Pathetic.’ I replied honestly. The swift topic change didn’t go unnoticed by me. ‘How about this – Are you Siri? Because you autocomplete me.’ I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at reading it. A billionaire working on pickup lines? Just wave some dollars in front of her and she’ll be all yours. ‘You can do better. Why working on it though? For Diana?’

The pizza doesn’t taste as good as when it was first delivered but with the help of this incredible creation—garlic sauce—it made the pizza taste pretty immaculate. I didn’t reply to Lance’s message and I just went ahead and ate while still feeling happy about the fact that he misses me. I just didn’t know what to say to him and while I was chewing, my head’s thinking about something else to say to him. I kept on creating some pickup lines in my head but they were all corny and just not that good. I ended up typing the most obvious reply. Me: I miss you too. I stared at the words for a long while hoping that I’d think of something good to say but there’s really nothing that’s coming inside m

He sighed and closed his eyes in defeat. “Fine, give me a damn line,” he muttered. I smiled, thinking of a line he could use. I didn’t want to give him one that was too good; after all, I didn’t actually want her to fall for it. “Okay, how about you say; do you mind if I hang out here until it’s safe back where I farted?” I joked, knowing he wouldn’t ever say that to a girl. He looked at me in disbelief.

Let's see what he has to say for himself, I just smiled at him. “What is a hot girl like you sitting all by yourself?” He said. I wanted to vomit, really does that line actually work? “What's right into the pickup line? Never thought of saying Hello first. That might have worked, you know.” I said, sounding a smartass. “Really? Would you take a do-over?” He said, sounding so eager.

Ayo: The sun is for the light, The Moon is for the night, And you are for the rest of my life Feyi: Yea, no. The rhyming words are amazing but this isn't even cheesy, talk less of cringy. Ayo: I'm not trying to woo you Fey, trust me. I could do that without the use of the internet 😉. Just showing you horrible pick up lines I found on some lame website Feyi: Suuurrreee Ay, show me the better ones you can come up with...

| Those are my own humble creation and here are some sciencey pick-up lines I collated from the Net (which, thankfully, is back at my imaginary fingertips): | Are you the square root of negative one? No. Why? Because there’s no way you can be real. | Are you copper? No. Why? Because I always CU in my dreams. | Are you the square root of two? No. Why? Because I’m irrational around you. | Are you vaporizing from a solid state? No. Why? Because I think you’re absolutely sublime. |

He smiled heartily; “If I may ask, don't you notice something strange about me?” “Strange? Ugh! Not at all” I shook my head. He continued smiling; “You are so pretty, that I forgot my pick up lines. Oops! I… I'm so bad at pick up lines” He stuttered, feeling awkward. I giggled. He was only being dramatic. “Okay, here's one. If I had a rose for everytime I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever” He stated. I faked a smile: “That's…uhm nice, nice line.. uhm?” I felt so uncomfortable around him especially when I realised what he was tryna insinuate.

“Most people find it stupid.” “Then you’re about to find out if I’m like most people or not,” he simply stated. I sighed. Well, here goes nothing then... “I like lines,” I confessed, and as I suspected, the alpha tried his hardest to hide his surprise. “Lines?” he echoed, trying not to sound as perplexed as he looked. “As in--- straight lines?” “Told you it’s stupid,” I grumbled, pealing off a pineapple and popping it into my mouth. My cheeks were boiling hot, and I couldn’t even imagine how stupid he thought I was right about now.