Jokes That Will Make You Pee Novels & Stories

"Okay! Okay! I will stop, but that joke of yours isn't good. Aren't there any more funny jokes?" I sat down next to Shin again. "I still have a lot of jokes," I replied. "Okay let me hear," "Here is a knock-knock joke. Knock-knock," - Me. "Who's there?" - Shin. "Tank," - Me. "Tank, who?" - Shin. "You're welcome!" Shin and I both poker-faced to that joke at the same time so I immediately drew a long line on it. "Knock! Knock!" - Me.

My smile widened as I mindlessly took off my jacket setting it down on the leather seat. I clung to Dalton chatting with him as Enzo thought it was the time for the like of the day as he called it. It was one of those stupid habits that we had going on as kids and it kinda stuck with us and Enzo was the one with the shittiest and corniest jokes. I braced myself to hear one of his dad jokes, Dalton was holding in his laugh at the eager look on his brother's face already. "What do you call a joke without a punchline?"

I have to do something! Right then Ryder talked. "I don't think I...." She started to say, but she didn't get to finish her sentence because a loud voice came from upstairs accompanied by sweet and cute giggles. Jeremy paled, feeling like his heart fell in his stomach. A big word of "FUCK" flashed past in his head. "Daddy Jeje, Leah said that Moon pooped in your shoes again." Jake's voice was heard from up the stairs. What daddy Jeje! What poop! Jake, my man, why are you embarrassing yourself like this? I told you to stay in your room!!!

“You scared me! Geez!” What was her name again? Piper? Pepper? “Hey! Yo momma is so ugly that if Shrek had a live action film, she wouldn’t even pass as the donkey,” I laughed out loud at my own joke while staring mockingly at the cat, as if it was Juno I was talking to and insulting directly.

I didn't know if his endearments were genuine or he loved making fun of me. "No, that's an absolute lie." I protested. "Have you ever slept facing the ceiling because your dick wouldn't go down? No, I think not." He said his eyes steady on the road. I gasped. "A cold shower.." This made him laugh hysterically, he had a contagious laugh... it had me smile but hey what was funny?

"Pregnancy has become disadvantage to you, Kitcat...I bet he'll tell you the grass is too green for you to step outside tomorrow." "Shut up, Liam. I'm not trying to make jokes." "And see...your pregnancy has become a disadvantage to me too...look at him snapping at me because of a fetus." "I'd advise you to shut your mouth, Liam...his face is getting red, it's about to swell...he's transforming into..." "Angry bird!" Liam and Fredd bursted out into hysterical laughing at their apparently funny joke...but Zillon didn't seem to find it funny, he was as serious as judge. "F*cking idiots..."

“Why would I change when you’ll never stop trying to earn a joke from every situation?” “Isn’t life more fun with jokes? Something to laugh about once in a while. You know, it makes the world beautiful and fun when it’s dark. Studies even say laughter heals faster than herbs do. Lowers pain, strengthens the heart, clears the head. Makes the blood flow freer. In short — that’s why I’m looking younger and living longer. Which of those old people in the pack is as old as me, uh? None. I’m the oldest.”

James laughed at himself -- over 40 years old and here he was doing the pee-pee dance. "Oh fuck!" James heard his wife shout. He looked over to where Christine was sitting at the picnic table. Even from where he was standing by the tents, he could see her blue eyes wide open in shock. "Got to pee?" he called over. "Yes, how did you..." Christine stopped. "The pills!" The skinny blonde mom practically fell backward off the bench. James felt the piss rising up his penis whether he wanted it to or not. He looked over to where Molly had raced off. He didn't think he could make it to the bathrooms in time.

“Hey, no brooding. This is an adventure, not a prison sentence. Let me distract you.” She turned to him, her expression wary. “What are you going to do? Tell me one of your terrible jokes?” “You wound me,” he said, clutching his chest dramatically. “But yes. Absolutely.” He cleared his throat, adopting a serious tone. “Why don’t skeletons fight each other?” Riele blinked, momentarily thrown off. “Why?” “Because they don’t have the guts.” The joke was terrible. Absolutely awful. But Riele burst into laughter anyway, the tension in her chest breaking apart with each giggle. Jay grinned, triumphant, as if her joy were his greatest victory.

I am so happy for them. “Whoa, slow down love, did you pee yourself again?” Crocell asked and I just smacked him with a pillow. “That joke is getting old so fast.” I narrowed my eyes and he held his hands up in surrender before pointing at the space between my legs where I definitely felt wetness on my bottom. I looked down to see that it is indeed wet. Crocell and I shared a look. “It’s either I peed myself or this is the twin wanting out.” I calmly said as a sharp pain shot up my spine.