Jokes That Will Make You Pee Novels & Stories

She closed her eyes feeling satisfied with her message. But she opened her eyes as realization hit her. "Oh, God! I am such an idiot! How could I send him such a blunt message? He will think I am a creep! My love story ended before it started!" She started whining like a kid and kicked her legs in the air feeling angry at herself. Her message was sent to him already and now she can't even delete it. "Please make me pregnant hubby!" ***** Emma Miller, Bold but becomes shy when she sees him! Dangerous but becomes nervous when she is around him! Crazy but becomes crazier when she falls in love with him!

"I could've told you about the child when we were still married, but I'd rather see you fall on your knees like how I used to beg for the love I deserve." "You lied to everyone, even to your son, all because you wanted revenge? Tell me, who's the ruthless person here, Katalina." -- Cadmus is a respected man, one that holds the world in his hand. To her, he was the best and the best is what Katalina deserves. But when she got heartbroken by the man she adores the most, all hell breaks loose for she was more than a wife left to be discarded. By using Percival, someone who can stand equal to Cadmus. She plans to make the ruthless billionaire regret the pain he caused her.

On the day there was an assassination attempt on the Don, my husband, the head of security for the Russo family, was busy coaxing his mistress, who had lost her temper and left. I did not call him for help but used my body as a shield to protect the Don while I was eight months pregnant. In my past life, my husband left his mistress behind and came back with his team of bodyguards to save the Don after I called him for help on the phone. My husband ended up saving the Don and was rewarded by the family with a promotion, but his mistress was killed in the process. Although my husband said nothing about it, he threw me into the shark tank on the day I was in labor. I was covered in blood when I looked at him for an answer. However, all he did was stare coldly at me. "Why did you have to get me to save the Don when he had so many other bodyguards to protect him? You forced me to come back because you're a materialistic woman who only wants fame and fortune! If it weren't for your phone call, Aurora wouldn't have died! You must pay for everything she suffered!" I ended up being torn apart by sharks, and even the baby inside my belly was not spared. When I opened my eyes again, I had returned to the day of the assassination attempt on the Don.

We spent years of our lives, trading insults at work and glaring across the office. Turning every coffee and lunch break into a battlefield. Nancy Gilbert and Alaric Wealth are two incompatible coworkers with different dreams, different directions but in the same environment. One day, a cruel video blows up Nancy’s world, leaving her shattered and all alone. Alaric finds this as an opportunity to get closer to her as he helps her overcome the situation. They start getting closer after that and everything is perfect until Michael, comes back with a plot twist for their happy ending. It is later discovered that Nancy’s hatred for Ric was because he failed to recognize her. And Ric’s torments were his punishment to her cause she broke a promise. By the end of this book, you will discover the romance was never between Nancy and Alaric but between Michael and Alaric. Or maybe, you’ll discover I just lied. You’ll just have to read to find out.

What is obsession? Am I obsessed? At first, I was just his substitute, then I became his real bride, then the supposed real bride returned, and I was kidnapped, tortured, and forced to divorce. Then I committed suicide because I couldn’t handle it, but I didn’t fucking die. Then I became a stalker of my ex-husband, who barely remembers me because I was declared dead by the world, and my face got melted down when acid was poured on me. I had a surgery that changed my whole face and my entire identity. Then I started working for him again and he fell in love with the new me, yet still traumatized by the old me, so I had to reveal to him that I was the same person. He was happy and relieved, but the world wasn’t. We were chewed on, spat out, and stepped on. Then he was fired from his company by his grandmother, who adopted a new son to take over the company. Then I was kidnapped again, and bombs were planted on me. We were able to defuse the bomb and escape. Then we were shot in the head by God knows who. His surgery was successful, but mine wasn’t, so I forgot everything about him and was forbidden to remember because a damn bullet is stuck in my head that could kill me if it moves to a sensitive part of my brain. Then suddenly, he was on the TV, framed for murder. I couldn’t hold back, I found myself in prison fighting for him with a gun in my hand, and somehow ended up in a coma, because the damn bullet in my head shifted… to the wrong direction. Then, in between this chaos, the doctor announced I-was-pregnant.

"Holy Shit. When did you get in here? Ben stepped out hours ago." the shock on his face when he sees my wide eyes staring down at his cock. "Do you walk all naked when no one is at home but you?" My thighs clenched together; I didn't know how I suddenly said that out. "Little girl, are you not afraid to take your eyes off? This can ruin you." His dominance wraps around his voice, my eyes trail off his cock, and I view his entire body. The masculinity got my thighs drooling and gave me the fastest shock I had ever felt in my stomach. It's the first time I've taken note of how perfect his body curves are. "Then I want to be ruined only by your cock." My eyes grow in size at my own words. Anastasia visited to resolve the issues revolving around her toxic relationship with Ben, her 21-year-old boyfriend. She happened not to meet him at home after he lied about being home. She was frustrated and pained because it looks like she has been putting more effort into the relationship than he has, and it was killing her. It was killing her that she always had to be the one getting hurt all the time. Even when he is wrong, she takes the blame for it and apologizes for no fucking reason. But everything changed when she saw his father's big cock that night at his place. She's never seen a cock as huge and dominating as his. A voice in her head screamed for her to run, but no, she was so curious to know how it would feel in her mouth and in her damn wet core.

When my son asked me about his father while crying once again, I pointed at the television. Samuel Shaw, who had just made it into the top three of the wealth rankings, was being interviewed. He said he had achieved fame and success, and the person he hated most was his childhood sweetheart and ex-wife. “She abandoned me when I was gravely ill, all for the sake of money. But it was that very betrayal that pushed me to rise from the ashes in my darkest hour.” The reporters grew excited and suggested contacting me on the spot. "She must be filled with regret, begging Mr. Shaw to take her back!" My phone rang right then. I answered and immediately asked for money. "Samuel, my son is sick. Could you lend me sixty thousand dollars?" He abruptly hung up the phone and said with a cold laugh, "Knowing she's living so miserably gives me peace of mind." Looking at the kidney failure report in my hand, I silently wept. Six years ago, I secretly donated one of my kidneys to Samuel. Now, his son was suffering from the same disease and didn't have much time left.

In my last life, I made the dumbest mistake—picked up a Moonlight Ring from the grass. That cursed thing locked me into a mate bond with Silvermoon Pack's Alpha. Too bad his heart already belonged to my sister, Irene. She lived to a hundred, had five pups with her real mate in Ravenshade Pack while I rotted. Every time she got cozy with her mate, Leon tossed me in the basement. "You picked up that ring! I had to watch my true love build a family with someone else!" For eighty years, she lived happily. I barely lived at all. Leon flayed me open, let my skin grow back, then crushed my bones just to watch them heal. Every day felt like dying on repeat. Only when Irene finally kicked the bucket did he let me go. Then boom—I woke up, right back on the day I picked up that damn ring. I wasn't gonna screw it up again. But Irene—always the clean freak—snatched it off the ground before I could stop her.

Noong unang beses na nakita ni Euphie ang lalaki, naisip niya: Love at first sight ba iyon? O isang nakatalagang soul mate? Pag-uwi niya, nakita niya ang isang lumang larawan ng isang matangkad at guwapong lalaki. Naglakbay siya pabalik sa panahon sa larawan, nakilala ang lalaking iyon, at natagpuan ang sagot sa tanong na iyon. Inisip niya ang lahat, ang kanyang kasintahan.

Clara Hughs is an orphan who was working in a bar as a waitress where rich men come to pick up girls. She encountered a strange handsome man at the club one night, Ragnor Usiku, who rescued her from trouble with her employer. Everything changed, as Clara Hughs found herself drawn to this man. Will Clara love him the same when she discovers who he is? Will their love bring them peace or will it create obstacles for them? To know more read "Will You Still Love Me The Same"