Workplace Quotes Funny

When they were married, billionaire tycoon Mr. Seven said, "That goth bitch is just after my money and my looks. If she dares to ever touch me, I'll chop her up into pieces."After the divorce, Mr. Seven went around telling others, "My wife has been bullied by her family all her life. She is the most gorgeous woman on earth. If you look at her funny, I'll gouge your eyes out!"Mr. Seven, do you even hear what you're saying?

"I'm gay." My eyes grow so big as I stop breathing, but two seconds later I'm bursting with laughter. "Okay funny," I finally tone down my laugh as I bring myself to look at him again. But he is still staring at me like he had been when he told me that joke. "Wait," uhh, "Really?" He nods, "Really." "You like... guys?" "I fuck guys." Oh wow, you really can't have it all can you. When he checks all the boxes, suddenly there's this big box he doesn't. The most important box, the top on the list. "You're gay or bi?" Because there's a big difference between those two. "I'm gay." "You never fuck a woman?" "I've never fucked a woman." "Then why the hell would you want me to be your sugar baby? To watch you fuck another man's butthole?" He smirks despite my little mockery. "Oh now it's funny?" "It is," he is still smirking, "But no. It's the opposite of what I wanna do." I bring my arms across my chest as I reply in my all-business tone, "Enlighten me." *** 22 year old Estelle is one of the best sugar babies the agency has ever had. She has the whole package, no dick ever gone soft seeing how perfect she is, both her body and personality. But can she sway Owen into the heterosexual group? After being in that homo-pool all this while?

Nate Wolf is a loner and your typical High School bad boy. He is territorial and likes to keep to himself. He leaves people alone as long as they keep their distance from him. His power of intimidation worked on everyone except for one person, Amelia Martinez. The annoying new student who was the bane of his existence. She broke his rule and won't leave him alone no matter how much he tried and eventually they became friends.As their friendship blossomed Nate felt a certain attraction towards Amelia but he was too afraid to express his feelings to her. Then one day, he found out Amelia was hiding a tragic secret underneath her cheerful mask. At that moment, Nate realized Amelia was the only person who could make him happy. Conflicted between his true feelings for her and battling his own personal demons, Nate decided to do anything to save this beautiful, sweet, and somewhat annoying girl who brightened up his life and made him feel whole again.Find my interview with Goodnovel: https://tinyurl.com/yxmz84q2

WE'RE BACK! Yes, your favorite cousins are back at it again, but this time it ain't about me. So, buckle up and grab your wine glasses, because it's gonna be crazy! Mina’s POV: Wait a damn minute. Am I in hell? Because if I am, I need to speak to HR. I didn't even get a chance to plead my case, give a reference or something. I'm about to start freaking out because, I'm not a “go to hell” and mean it type of person. I can't do heat for five minutes let alone an eternity. I feel like giving my life to save a baby and a man should have gotten me at least joint visitation six months in heaven and six months in hell. “Mina, are you awake?” I heard the voice quietly say next to my ear. I tried opening my eyes, but it felt like I had sand in them. I decided to try speaking, but only let out something that sounded like a sick animal. "Wait right there let me get you some water.” I heard a voice whisper again. Who the hell is that? I have heard that voice before but couldn't figure out who the hell it was. “! We need to move; they've found us.” The voice came again. Wait, what? Who the hell are they? I tried opening my eyes again, this time I managed to get them open enough to see the figure picking me up bridal style. Then the stranger turned his head to look directly in my eyes and I knew instantly who it was. “Blaze? You gotta be shitting me.” I said, obviously shocked. “Hey, can we join the party? I hope you are serving food because we are famished.” I heard a man say.

Nick Henderson and Gabriel Swann are so very happy with their love affair. They have had five years of being alone with each other, and they have talked about having a third party in their relationship. Being bisexual they both love women but they both agree it would take someone so special to love both of them. All Millie Ashton wants is a family who loves her. Her mother has zero maternal instinct, and her two older half-sisters, twins and fashion models Pearl and Ruby, use her as a slave! After a massive row over a ruined top, Millie leaves home. On a wet and windy March day, Millie walks into what seems to be akin to a tiger's den. Superstar rock-god musicians Nick Henderson and Gabriel Swann, need a housekeeper. Was looking after the twins a case of better the devil you know, or will Millie find the most wonderful family.

"Mr Charlie, your son fought in school again" Charlie's assistant reported, Charlie was shocked, he didn't remember having another son in College again. "You fulfilled your promise, so, I will make you my wife no matter what, and I won't take a no for an answer," Charlie told Margret without mincing words. Margret didn't expect her return to Houston with two of her triplets will be very dramatic, a man she doesn't recognise claiming she promised to give him triplets, and another man who wanted to snatch her children from her. And her other son, who doesn't recognise her as his mother.

Sext Buddy: [I’d do anything to fuck you right now.] Alicia: [I want you so bad too…really.] During the summer, Alicia has been sexting with a total stranger in hopes that she’d never meet him. At the beginning of college, her mum tells her that they have a guest. She meets the stranger she was constantly sexting. But then, what happens when the stranger is her cousin?

It's funny though to think her one night stand would lead to her joy, her very existence, her son! Being duped by her groom at the altar, is all it takes for Mikaella Sandoval to sacrifice her virginity to a complete stranger who swoops in at the right time leading to a son that binds them

Felicity McCarthy and orphan young girl who was raised by her aunt after the loss of her parents and was pampered and loved by her. But due to the shock she sustained in the accident, she was like a child even at twenty four years. Raymond Baldwin, a cold, rich, self centered aloof businessman who cares about nothing but his business and anything that will give him more money. Unfortunately, things got difficult when his grandparents refused to handover their multi billion dollar company to him unless he finds a bride. Raymond decided to rent a bride for a year in order to win them over. What will happen when a cute, childish bride marries a cold aloof groom?

Anastasia Samuel, happy go lucky, bubbly woman with God gifted beauty who is currently in the need of a job. What could go wrong, right? Actually a lot can go wrong after she lost her memory in a tragic accident and is now living a new life for three years without any hint of the past. She is living a miserable life where her mind makes her forget every small event which she doesn't want to remember. Darius Henderson, the handsome and cold hearted devil who is also known as the CEO of the Henderson empire. What happens when Anastasia bumps into him and his blood boils in hatred after three long years and claims to be her husband about whom she doesn't remember anything! She needs a job. He will give her a job, as his personal assistant. And things will start to go down. He had broken her heart before and now he will break her soul but will he be able to cure her by giving his heart to her later? ____ "Anastasia! Where are you going?" Darius asked her in a worried tone while he was kneeling down by her with a worried look on his face. The hatred in his eyes was gone as if it was never there. "To work?" Anastasia asked in an amusing tone as if she was finding the question really funny. "Are you okay? You were just screaming in your unc-... sleep." He asked with a deep frown. Anastasia waved his words off with a small chuckle. "I was having a bad dream about you claiming me as your wife and.. kissed me. Haha, funny right?" She said and laughed out loud like it was the funniest joke ever while Darius looked at her with shock written all over his face.