Novel & Cerita Disobedient

Noong mga panahong wala kaming inisip kundi ang tawag ng katawan namin. Si Vin ang naging bunga sa gabing yun. A forbidden night with my cousin. I can't hardly believe na nagbunga ang lahat ng ginawa namin ni Vincent. I've gotten pregnant by him. Vin was made out from our mistake but since he was born everything seems to be perfect. Giving him birth was the only perfect thing I know that I've done. Inaamin ko na at first, abortion was my first option but sooner naisip kong tinatakasan ko na naman yung katotohanan and escaping from the truth that brings you pain doesn't means bravery. Buong buhay ko, puro pagtatakas yung ginawa ko but fate and destiny was indeed a prisky prankster. Destiny ha

Hindi ko na hinintay ang sasabihin ni Manong at agad na akong tumakbo palabas ng gate at pumara ng taxi. Sorry Dad but let me just do what I want. Ito lang naman ang gusto ko pero ayaw niyo kaya wala akong choice kundi suwayin kayo. I've never disobeyed you but I will now. Hindi naman po ito illegal and I promise Dad na dito ako sasaya sa ginagawa ko. I hope you understand.

Ang pangit ko tuloy tignan. Nakakainis! Gusto kong lumabag sa sinabi ni Papa. Ang ayaw ko sa lahat ay ang pinagbabawalan. Total ay wala naman akong ginagawa rito. Mabuburdo lang ako. Prohibition generates different reactions to me. A ban that ignites an attraction entices me more to do it. It makes me happy for unknown reason. Iba ang fulfilment na binibigay nito sa akin. Hindi ko rin alam kung bakit.

Halos puro english kasi ang sinabi niya, konti lang yung naintindihan ko. Andun pa lang kasi ako sa ‘who disobeys me.’ At yung iba.., hindi ko na masyadong nasundan. Siguro mamaya, ipapaulit ko na lang.

Bakit ayaw mong hilingin ano man ang gusto mo? "Nananadya ka ba? you know damn right that we're still finding our place into this family.!" "Don't shout at me. I am not your servant, bitch." "Ass.." "That attitude of yours won't be able to find a seat in the Blackwood family. I hate it that I'm drag onto this mess, damnit! You better behave and don't act like a spoiled brat in front of me, otherwise, iiwan kita rito at babalik na lamang ako sa amerika."

Thank you for answering! Gosh, someone's so grumpy right now because of that! I couldn't reply. I just don't know what to say. I'm not dense and I know what she's talking about. Pero ewan ko ba, I keep on ignoring the thought. Minsan lang ako active sa F******k. Wala akong magawa ngayon kasi wala namang assignments or anything tapos hindi pa ako inaantok kasi ang haba ng supposedly ay 'nap' ko lang, kaya hindi ko namalayang magmi-midnight na and I'm still on F******k. I wouldn't know if it weren't for Sir Troy's chat.

Maliit na bagay nga lang yun at kailangan niya din naman uminom ng tubig. Wait. Why am I thinking about her? Ano naman ngayon kung mauhaw siya? Hindi ko na problema yun, at dapat lang magtanda siya dahil hindi siya nakikinig and she kept on disobeying me. Dikit rin siya ng dikit kay Range na parang kaya rin siyang saluhin nun parati. Kahit mag back up pa siya kay Range hindi pa rin yun eepekto. I'm the man in this house and no one, not even her, can make me obey anyone.

tanong ni Spike sa kalagitnaan ng byahe namin papunta sa place kung saan namin ime-meet ang wedding coordinator. "I don't have one. Niminsan hindi ko pinangarap ikasal. Ayaw kong matali sa kahit na sino. Gusto ko 'yong malaya ako sa kahit na anong gusto kong gawin." Hindi siya sumagot. Hindi na rin ako nagsalita. Mula no'ng araw na kinuha niya ako hanggang ngayon ay paulit-ulit pa ring tumatakbo sa isipan ko kung anong pwede kong gawin para mapa-konsensya ko siya. Should I kneel and beg?

Walang atubili niyang sabi. Tanging mag ismid ng palihim ang nagawa ko, kahit naman siguro hindi siya ang pinakasalan ko that time ay siguradong mangingialam siya kung hindi talaga niya gusto kung sino ang napili ko. In the first place, wala akong karapatan to make decision that time. But I don’t think kaya ko pa rin na maging obedient tulad ng dati. I know how it feels to be unable to fight for something you want.

Napakaganda at napakasarap kausap ni Father Theodore. "Surrender means that you stop building up every reason you can think of why God doesn't love yoiu. Instead, hand over your doubts to Him. Confess them to Him; speak them out loud. He already knows about them but you'll be surprised at the relief you'll feel just by talking it out with Him."