Lirik Secondhand Serenade

Di usia yang hampir 40 tahun, pengusaha sukses dan tampan cukup banyak wanita yang wara wiri dalam kehidupa seorang Samudra Abimanyu. Tapi selama ini belum ada yang benar-benar mampu membuatnya terpikat. Rata-rata mereka hanya “mampir” sebentar sebelum digantikan oleh wanita-wanita lain. Tidak hanya para temannya yang menjulukinya playboy bahkan beberapa majalah dengan terang-terangan menyebutkan bahwa dia adalah casanova, mungkin ada benarnya saking seringnya dia gonta-ganti perempuan. Satu pantangan Samudra adalah tidak akan mengencani pegawainya, dia tidak ingin merusak citra dan profesionalitas kerja dengan love affair di kantor. Dan sampai saat ini dia tidak pernah melanggarnya, biarpun tidak sedikit staff wanita yang kepincut dengannya. Bos muda, kaya dan ganteng. Sabrina. Why on earth sosok wanita ini tiba-tiba sibuk mondar-mandir di pikirannya? Semenjak kali pertama interview, sosoknya rajin nongol tanpa diundang ke kepalanya. Seperti tidak ada wanita lain saja, pikirnya sinis ke diri sendiri. Walaupun banyak bergonta – ganti pacar, dia memang tidak terlalu sibuk untuk memikirkan perempuan. Buat dia pacar adalah selingan diantara kesibukan pekerjaan, selingan untuk mencerahkan hari, pelengkap untuk dibawa ke resepsi bukan untuk memenuhi pemikiran. Mendapatkan pacar baru buat dia sama mudahnya seperti membeli jas baru, sekali lirik bisa dipastikan perempuan akan tersipu – sipu kepincut. Tetapi Sabrina lain. Ada sesuatu tentangnya yang menyedot perhatian Samudra. Cantik, yes…tapi lebih dari itu. Gayanya yang anggun tapi terkesan berjarak, ada sesuatu darinya yang menyedot perhatian Samudra. Seperti black hole yang menyedot semua energi dan masa di sekitarnya, Sabrina juga menyedot semua fokus dan perhatian Samudra.

While studying abroad, I move into a shared apartment. Not a single day goes by without my housemate, Stuart Harper, calling himself some variation of a sweet, brave, and responsible guy. On the very first day he moves in, he hires workers to take out the insulation from the walls. I confront him about it, but he simply grins at me and proudly boasts about his decision. "That was all just some shoddy foam that the construction workers padded the walls with. Not only was it useless, but it was even taking up so much space. The fact that I forked out my own money to get rid of it proves that I'm such a sweet and responsible guy!" With a scowl on my face, I explain to Stuart the purpose of having proper insulation. He immediately leans in close with an admiring gaze. "I'm so sorry. I had no idea! I just wanted to do something nice for us. What should I do now? You have to help me think of something!" I naively assume Stuart just lacks common sense and doesn't act with malice. Thus, I willingly enter into a cycle of always cleaning up after his messes. One day, I get a fever. He ends up buying a secondhand electric slow cooker and declares he's going to take care of me by cooking me soup. My head throbs as I quickly put a stop to his attempt to heat the electric slow cooker on the induction stove. I tell him to let me catch a nap before I teach him how to cook later. But not long after I fall asleep, he secretly sticks the electric slow cooker into the microwave to heat it up. The microwave explodes. As the flames start to spread, Stuart screams and dashes out of the apartment at once. The fire alarm wakes me up. I try to evacuate the burning building, only to find that Stuart has locked the door from the outside. In the end, the fire burns me to a crisp. After that, however, he starts twisting things around. He goes online and says with a helpless expression, "My housemate set the apartment on fire while cooking. I'm the one who had to call the fire department on his behalf, and I even had to compensate the landlord for him. I'm definitely the sweetest, bravest, and most responsible guy to ever live!" As the online community proceeds to condemn me, Stuart uses the attention and publicity to go viral as a content creator. Some time later, my eyes open again. This time, I'm going to roast him good.