Pinoy Classic Jokes Novels & Stories

I need to tell you something! Elian: If this is another stupid joke, I’ll hurt you. Niko: Go for it, wild thing. It’s been a while since we had a good joke from you. Wilder: Yeah, I’m awesome like that. Anyway … why was the plumber so good in bed? Saint: No idea, Wilder. Wilder: Because he knew how to handle a leaky pipe. Saint: You’re getting better at this. Wilder: I’m fucking awesome, just admit it.

She sobs and keeps begging, “ Cody, please. I am sorry. I am wrong. Please forgive me.” I smile cruelly, “ God is the one who should forgive you. And I am the one who will send you to see God.” It is a funny joke. When I told the joke, I wanted to laugh, but I did not. My only audience, Gina, did not get the point at all. She is stunned and looks at me as if she is stupid. Soon, she comes to her senses and keeps begging loudly, “ Cody, please forgive me. Please let me go. It is so painful...”

takang tanong ko kahit gusto ko naman ang ginawa niya. Ngumiti siya nang makahulugan. "I know you have reasons, and I am not in the right place to answer her. Ang sabi ng mga kaklase mo, nalapa ka raw ng mga mababangis na hayop sa probinsyang pinuntahan niyo, o kung hindi kaya ay na-kidnap at pinatay. What a stupid hyperbole," aniya at lumagok ulit ng pangmaraming baso.

wowwww wla akung maintindihan "May kwento ako kaya makinig ka" so childish and stupid "May limang daga, isa sa limang daga ay kakaiba. Imbis na maglaro siya kasama ang apat ay lagi siyang naghahanap ng kanyang pagkain lagi niyang iniisip ang bukas, isang araw nagtanong ang apat na daga sa kanya" bakit yan ang inuuna mo? Pwde ka namng maglaro kasama namin pero mas pinili mong mag imbak ng pagkain para sa bukas, masaya ka ba hindi ka namn nakakalaro? "

Yung lalaking kaya kang ipagtanggol kahit saang gyera. Nang puntahan ay pinakita ni Limuel ang mga huli nitong isda. Ang lalaki at ang tataba. “H-hala! Paano mo nagawa yan?” takang-taka si Tala. “Hindi marunong uminom ang asawa mo pero magaling mangisda at least hindi ka gugutumin niyan,” biro ni Jeff. “Anong akala mo sa akin, taga Maynila? Laking Bohol ako no! Sisiw sa akin ang pagdakma ng isda,” yun lang at may nadakma na naman itong isang malaking isda.

["Oh? Nasaan ka apo?" ["Nasa mall po, La. Si lolo po ba nandiyan?"] Tanong ko. ["Ha? Ah eh wala eh, alam mo naman ang lolo mo, busy, masyadong mahal ang trabaho."] Inilapag ni lola saglit ang phone niya tapos kinuha ulit, ["Ay siya apo, busy ka yata. Mag-enjoy ka diyan kasama ang mga classmate mo."] Tumingin ako sa paligid ko at nakakita ng isang maliit na portal, nandoon si lola at kumakaway. ["Nako, kayo talaga, La. Hahaha!"]

Mayroon din kaming watermelon at pineapple plantations na halos punuin ang bank accounts namin tuwing summer. “Hindi naman problema sayo ang pera, obviously. Pero handa ka ba talagang tustusan ang lalaking hindi mo naman kakilala at kaano-ano?” Taas-kilay na tanong ni Kuya Dylan. Tumahimik ang lamesa at sabay-sabay na nagtinginan sa akin ang triplets, naghihintay sa sagot ko.

“In the middle of a dark forest, a man and a woman have sex. After about 15 minutes, the man finally gets up and says, ‘Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!’ The woman replies, ‘Me too. You’ve been eating grass for the past ten minutes!’” Then I burst into loud laughter. ********* “Stop it, Conan. For Christ’s sake.” I laughed frantically to get away from him. A chuckle broke out while he tickled my neck, armpits, and waist. “If you don’t stop being childish, I will surely kill you.” “Would you like me to tell you another joke?” “Oh, no!” I blurted out. “I’ll pee in my gown if you don’t stop your dirty jokes.”

I knew this was a classic trap—gave one a taste first, then reeled one in once they were hooked. "Then… I'll give it a shot?" Mr. Somner smiled and handed me the chips. "Go on. Young people need some drive." I walked up to a dice table and casually placed a few bets. Luck was on my side. I won a few rounds, and my chips grew to over 30 thousand dollars. "See!" Noah exclaimed excitedly beside me. "I told you you'd be good at this!" "This is the place my dad came to before as well, right?"

reduced his feeling of reading the awkwardness of friends. Pepeng Masarap😂😂 Jusko! It's great to find an office here! Pepeng Maliit😂😂 Well, chiiiill lang is meee😂 Pepeng Malaki😂😂 Guuuuyss andaming pogii ditoo😅😅 He just laughed as he typed. Pepeng Kulot😂😂 There are pogii here too! I'm still next to isaaaa😍😍