I've always found the way this ship handles emotional development is pretty slow and internal, honestly. Wei Wuxian starts off as someone who deflects with humor and grand gestures—his love is action, not words, protecting people even when it destroys him. Post-resurrection, that changes; he's quieter, carrying that guilt, and Lan Wangji becomes his anchor. The growth isn't about big declarations, but Lan Wangji learning to speak through small, relentless acts—a forehead ribbon, a song, just being there. Wei Wuxian, in turn, learns to accept that care, to lean on someone instead of being the lone sacrifice.
It reverses their youthful dynamics where Lan Wangji was the rigid one. By the end, Lan Wangji's the emotionally open one, patiently waiting, while Wei Wuxian does the hard work of learning to be vulnerable. The 'I'm here' moment gets me every time—it's not fixing each other, but offering a steady presence so the other can heal themselves.
The ship works because the growth is mutual but asymmetrical, fitting their scars. They don't erase each other's pain; they just make a space where it doesn't have to be borne alone.