When Everything Seems To Be Broken Novels & Stories

Binuksan ko ang lumang kaset ni Mama at hinanap ang station na nagpapatugtog ng mga classic na kanta. Agad na umalingawngaw ang pamilyar na kantang 'I don't want to talk about it' ni Rod Stewart. "I don't want to talk about it, How you broke my heart, If I said it won't you stay a bit longer, If I said it won't you listen, To my heart... 'Ohh my heart..." Madamdamin kong sinabayan ang kanta habang hinahanda ang kanin para isaing. Hindi ko mapigilan na napatawa at mapailing sa sarili ko. Mukha siguro akong siraulo.

Everything is so peaceful, calm, and beautiful. Ito palagi ang nararamdaman ko sa araw-araw. The beautiful place of Polimoa gives me that feeling. The place is extremely beautiful. Lahat ng tao ay mababait, masayahin at palakaibigan. Nothing is imperfect. Almost flawless. Like the water of Samaya falls that envelops my porcelain skin. It feels good and very relaxing.

"Hindi po ah. Tsaka saan po ba tayo pupunta?" Nabitin lang sa hangin ang tanong ko dahil hindi naman niya ako sinagot. Napakaano talaga. Sinayang ko nalang ang oras ko sa pagtingin sa bintana, kahit gabi ay makikita mo ang ganda ng paligid. Sabi nila, everything will be boring without light, well for me, darkness is better than light because it brings peace and comfort kase hindi mo makikita yung mga bagay na magdudulot sayo ng sakit. But then, sometimes, I realized. Darkness brings monsters but monsters is the one that makes us stronger.

“GUSTO KO LANG MAGING MASAYA! I CAN'T HAVE THE CHILDHOOD I WANT! THE TEENAGE LIFE I WANT! I CAN'T HAVE THE LIFE I WANT! ITO NA LANG, ITO NA LANG ANG PAMBAWI KO. I WANT TO LIVE MY MARRIED LIFE THE WAY I WANT TO!” “THEN SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER! YOU CAN'T! THIS IS LIFE, YOU CAN'T HAVE EVERYTHING YOU WANT, YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS! IT'S UNFAIR? SAANG NATION KA BA NAKATIRA? SA IMAGINATION? THEN WELCOME TO THE REALITY, PIECE OF SHIT!” “M-Mom? D-Dad? W-Why are you fighting?”

“Ayoko na lang sanang magsinungaling, Cailyn. I still love you.” Napalayo siya nang bahagya, pero hindi na siya nakasagot. Sa halip, tumingin lang siya sa langit, pilit iniwas ang luha. “Love doesn’t fix everything, Austin,” bulong niya. “Sometimes, it breaks you even more.” “Then let it break me,” sabi nito, halos desperado. “Kung ‘yun lang ‘yung paraan para maramdaman ulit kita.”

Pero nang maalala niya ang kanyang kalagayan, ay muli siyang nataranta. Hindi niya matanggap ang nangyari sa kanya. Ano pa bang maihaharap niyang mukha sa mga tao? Wala na siyang mga paa at nabali pa ang kabilang braso niya. Pati mukha niya ay may na-dislocate pang buto. Gusto niyang gumanti kay Vanessa pero hindi niya magawa dahil sa kalagayan niya. Dahil sa labis na pagkadismaya sa sarili ay muli na naman siyang naghisterikal.

“Ako na lang, Ma. Kaya ko naman—“ Umiling siya. “Hindi, sasamahan kita.” I sighed and nod. Pumasok ako sa kwarto ko at nagbihis. Muli kong narinig ang bangayan ng dalawa at hindi ko na naman napigilan ang maiyak. My dreams have broken, and it was painful. But the most painful is when the family that I thought was perfect had already shattered into pieces a long time ago.

Lumunok si Ruth, pinipigilan ang sarili sa kaharap bago inangat ang tingin dito. "The one who rule the world is money, so money will tell you what is right and what is wrong." Kumuyom ang kamao ni Ruth, hindi niya inalis ang namumuhing tingin sa ginang hanggang sa makaalis ito. Iginaya ito palabas ng principal, kaya naman tumayo narin si Tina, pinunasan nito ang luha sa mga pisngi.

The world was so cruel, that you wanted to end everything to make it more easier for you. May makikilala kang tao na magiging dahilan kung bakit mas lalong nagiging magulo ang mundo mo. Minsan dadaan lang sila just to make you feel that you're not worth it, to feel that you're not enough. Or sometimes, they were the reasons why you changed your principles in life. Life wasn't a competition, that you needed to compete so you can fit in this world. You just have to find yourself, and find your peace.

Make it meaningful. Hindi ko rin ma judge ang iba sa pagbibigay ng second chance sa kanilang partner dahil tulad ko worth it ni Ryker ang ipaglaban siya hanggang dulo. Hindi natin hawak ang panahon at oras pero nasa atin pa rin kung paano natin pahalagahan ang buhay. When I thought he's the man who broke my heart, it turns out that he was the man who fixed and healed my broken heart. He's fragile and I want to take care of him for the rest of my life like he does.