Lonely A Man Without Love Novels & Stories

Nasa sariling kwarto ako habang yakap ang larawan ng aking ina. Kanina lang ay inilibing ang labi nito. Hanggang ngayon, hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala na wala na ang mahal kong ina. I was alone, and lonely, my heart was full of agony and miseries. Namumugto na ang aking mga mata sa walang-patid kong pagluha. Paano na ngayon ako gayong wala na ang aking ina?

I don't how kung paano niya nakakaya 'yon. Iniisip ko pa lang kasi na mawawala sa akin si Mommy ay pakiramdam ko ay bibigay ako agad. Kunin niyo na lahat sa akin but not my family, never. I am alone in my room right now. Hindi dito matutulog sila kuya and finally my bed can rest. I'm sitting in my couch and making myself busy with my phone. I almost fell off my couch when my phone rang. Topher calling....

“Just trust me on this, hija. I won’t fail you. I will talk to your prof next day para maaga nating paghandaan to.” “Okay po” Katatapos ko lang maligo. Buti at nagka video call kaming tatlo nila mama kahit papano ay nabawassan ang pangungulila ko sa kanilang dalawa. I badly wanted to win, naiiyak parin ako nung makita ko ang kalagayan nilang dalawa. Pumayat na si mama at si papa naman halatang kulang sa tulog. Ang hirap na kahit ilang kamag-anak ay wala kaming mahingan ng tulong, only child rin kasi sila both sides. I know may distant relative rin naman ata sila pero di rin raw nila nakakausap ang mga yon.

Buong araw, nagagawa kong tumakas sa mga masasakit alaala, ngunit pagdating ng gabi, hindi ko matakasan ang sakit. I keep on thinking of Simoun, as if I am longing. Maybe because I spent too much nights with him. I got used to sleep beside him, feeling his warmth, smelling his scent. Now I’m all alone. Every night, I’m sleeping without his arms wrapping around my waist. I’m sleeping with his memories in my head. And it's killing me.

There's a time and a place and a reason and I know I got a love to believe in all I know got to win this time Without you, one night alone Is like a year without you baby do you have a heart of stone? Without you Can't stop the hurt inside when love and hate collide You could have a change of heart If you would only change your mind 'Cause I'm crazy 'bout you baby Crazy, crazy Without you, one night alone Is like a year without you baby do you have a heart of stone? Without you, one night alone Is like a year without you baby if you have a heart at all

The height of the window is up to my neck if I tiptoe. Manuel reached for my chin and adjusted to kiss me in my lips again. This time, matagal ‘yon. It’s deep and passionate. “I love you with all the dangers that surrounds us. I love you so much that I am willing to lose myself just to beat the demon that haunts you everynight.” His eyes were staring at the depth of mine. His words were no other but will always be music to my heart. Sa lahat ng pinagdaanan ko, naniwala akong wala ng taong makakapagpagaling sa puso’t isip kong labis na nasugatan. But I was wrong when Manuel came and gave light to the darkness of my life.

Walang ng inang makakasama o makakausap kahit kailan. Tulad din no'n ang nararamdaman ko ngayon. Magmula sa araw na ito ay wala na akong makikitang Uncle Alejandro na nakaupo sa swivel chair niya sa loob ng opisina. Wala nang magbibigay ng payo sa'kin at pagsasabihan ako sa tuwing may ginagawang mali. All of those things disappeared like flames in the air. Now I understand. Being lonely is difficult and very painful.

Dinama ko ang bawat liriko ng awitin na nagdulot sa akin ng masidhing kalungkutan. When I was young I never needed anyone And making love was just for fun Those days are gone Livin' alone I think of all the friends I've known But when I dial the telephone Nobody's home All by myself Don't wanna be All by myself Anymore Hard to be sure Sometimes, I feel so insecure And love's so distant and obscure Remains the cure All by myself Don't wanna be All by myself Anymore All by myself Don't wanna live All by myself Anymore

Nanginginig ng sobra ang malamig niyang palad ngayon. "Grabeng heartbreak at trauma binigay mo sakaniya! at dahil sa takot ko na ayaw na niyang sumubok na magmahal hindi ko na sinubukan yung sarili ko!" Nanikip ang dibdib ko hindi lang dahil sa sinabi ni Clyde kundi narin dahil sa pagtulo ng mga luha niya.

He was playing the piano while singing the beautiful but lonely lyrics in front of me. Unti-unting bumigat ang pakiramdam ko. Bigla ring nalungkot ang puso ko sa mga alaala na ni minsan ay hindi pa rin pala nawala sa puso't isipan ko. But there's a danger in loving somebody to much, and it's bad when you know it's your heart you can't trust. There's a reason why people don't stay where they are. Baby, sometimes love just ain't enough. Hindi ko namalayang may isang butil na pala ng luha ang siyang nalaglag sa gilid ng aking mga mata.