Fear Of God 소설 & 이야기

"Duh~ As if naman papayag akong iba ang dalhin mo sa langit. Mabuti nga at natitikman pa kita." "Good for you," tangin tugon ni Genesis. Isang lang naman ang dahilan kung nagkakaganito siya, at kung bakit hindi niya pwedeng galawin ulit si Lucky? Because he discovered that Lucky was sick. She developed gynophobia because of her beliefs, natatakot si Lucky na makipagtalik dahil nakatanim sa isip ng kaibigan niya na malaking kasalanan sa Diyos ang premarital s*x.

Kung hindi pa niya na-control ang sarili, baka natugon niya ang halik nito. Walang ibang lalaking nangahas na halikan siya kung hindi si Goddy lang, gayon na lang ang takot niya kanina. Takot siyang baka mahulog na naman sa kumunoy. Sana lumayo na ito sa kanya dahil hindi niya alam kung hanggang saan ang pagpipigil niya sa sarili.

Tahimik na humigop ng kape. Tahimik na huminga. Pero sa loob? Umaalon ang dibdib niya. Jealousy. Insecurity. Confusion. And for the first time… …fear. Fear na baka tama si Camille. Fear na baka hindi siya sapat sa mundong pinapasok niya. At higit sa lahat— Fear na baka masaktan na naman siya ni Nathan.

“Hindi mo puwedeng iligtas tayo sa pamamagitan ng pagbura sa sarili mo.” “This isn’t rescue.” “It’s reaction.” “It’s strategy.” “It’s fear.” Tumama iyon. Dumilim ang mga mata niya. “Yes,” mahina niyang sabi. “It is fear.” Tinamaan ako sa tapat ng dibdib. Lumapit pa siya. Sobrang lapit na parang nawala si Victor sa kwartong ito. “I am afraid,” sabi ni Gabriel. “Afraid that every enemy I made can reach you because of me.”

He stared at her, feeling a cold twist of panic settle in his stomach. “Then why the hell did you say we’d kill a god?!” He snapped, his voice rising a little more than he meant it to. He wasn’t even mad—not really. He was just terrified of the thought that there was nothing they could do, that they were standing there waiting for something they couldn’t fight, couldn’t hurt, couldn’t stop.

Itatabi na sana niya sa bulsa ng kaniyang pantalon ang kaniyang cell phone nang bigla na lamang siyang niyakap ni Luna. “Don't leave me alone. I'm…I'm scared,” umiiyak na sabi ni Luna. Isinubsob niya ang kaniyang mukha sa dibdib ni Yael. Hindi agad nakagalaw si Yael. "Huwag kang mag-alala. Hindi kita iiwan, Luna,” paniniguro niya habang hinahaplos ang buhok ni Luna. Nais niya sanang itanong kung bakit ito natatakot pero mas minabuti niyang hindi na lang magsalita. ‘It’s either mayroon siyang agoraphobia (fear of being stuck), acrophobia (fear of heights) or basophobia (fear of falling). Hindi ko alam na may ganitong form ng anxiety si Luna. What could have been the cause of it?’

sabi neto saka tumayo at nakatingala padin ako at si lord christ naman ay nakangisi saakin "Fear is not a power but fear can be power if you'll use it" makahulugan nyang saad bago ako iniwang nakatulala. Anong takot ba ang sinasabi ni lord christ Halata bang takot na takot ako sa kanya matapos ng nang yare, lahat naman ata dito takot sa kanya. Saka bago ang fairytale na kinukwento nya. Magre-research nalang ako mamaya about sa history ni great rubern

Dahan-dahang pinakawalan ang hangin sa mga baga ko. They say my husband-to-be is a hellhound. That he can figure out your deepest fear in minutes and use it against you. I guess it becomes easy to detect fear—become well-acquainted with it, even—when so many people are afraid of you. But I’m not one of them. I’m not afraid of him. And I think he knows it, too. Right from the very beginning, my fear was never for myself. It was for the people I cared about. It’s why I stepped in front of Papa and Atticus that day at the engagement, and it’s why I stepped in front of Beny today.

Bakit hindi ko nakikita ang sarili kong iyon kay Apple? Dravour, hindi ba't ito na ang huling pagkakataong ibinigay mo sa sarili mo para kumilatis ng babaeng ihaharap sa mama mo? You even hoped that this last one would finally work! And, if ever, IF EVER, that this one works, what are you so afraid of? Bakit ka hindi mapakali? Bakit ka nag-aalala? Why are you so afraid to fall? Maybe because, the previous ones left you upon seeing the worst version of you? Because they were so scared of you? Na hindi rin malabong mangyari sa ngayong nandito si Apple?

Histeric na sabi niya. I caught Uno intensely looking at me while his forehead was slightly creased. I automatically averted my eyes when I remembered what happened in the test. It's still vivid. Sa dinami-dami ba naman ng lalaking makikita doon—bakit si Uno pa? Pwede naman si tres nalang! I am more comfortable with tres! What was that fear called? Intimacy? A fear of intimacy? I never imagined myself doing that to someone, especially Uno!