Humorous Sarcastic Quotes

NOT FOR READERS UNDER THE AGE OF 16. "As if." I scoffed looking around, my eyes was starting to hurt from how much sex I'm seeing. My jaw almost dropped at what those douchebags are doing over there. "Light, camera, action!!" the producer said and I shook my head in disbelief, three omegas were on top of a pack member I recognize all too well, he's one of Adams' friends, they were having a foursome in front of so many people, and the camera, are they going to sell or upload the video? "Neither, they are going to send it to the pack members who want it," Charlie replied to my unsaid question looking at me warily. "What a very amazing pack this is," I said sarcastically. "Well, she's all yours. This is where you belong," he threw a smirk in my direction and I rolled my eyes at him "show her around and make her feel at home." Jack beamed shaking her ass once again. "Make sure you stop by again." Charlie said biting her index finger and I started at her in disgust. "Follow me." She instructed leading the way and swaying her hips from side to side shaking her ass, her butt was jiggling so much I was concerned if it would fall off, I wonder how many men have fucked and touched her. "Exactly one hundred and twenty-three men." She replied nonchalantly and my jaw dropped. “This is your life now!” She smirked throwing her head back to look at me, a let out sarcastic laughter knowing fully well I'd rather die!! The day I get my full strength back, that day, I will make Alpha Mayers pay with his life.

Audrey, an enchanting young woman from a middle-class family, finds herself enamored with Frank, the most handsome man in college. Frank, infamous for his habit of using and discarding women, intends to treat Audrey no differently. On Frank's birthday, Audrey visits his impressive, opulent home, where she meets some of his family members. During the visit, Frank propositions Audrey, asking her to sleep with him. When she refuses, he callously decides to end their relationship. As he is about to leave, Audrey, torn and desperate, reluctantly agrees. He smirks in triumph. However, just before their intimacy progresses, Audrey receives a distressing call from her troubled brother, with whom she lives with since the death of their parents. He sounds like he’s in grave danger, prompting her to rush to his aid, leaving Frank alone. Upon her arrival home, her brother simply asks her to go to bed. Perplexed but obedient, she complies, wary of his volatile temper. The next morning, as she prepares for college, she is astonished to find Frank’s uncle, Zack, in her house. What could Zack's unexpected presence mean? Is Audrey in peril, or does fate have something unexpected in store for her? Discover the unfolding drama in this thrilling, humorous, and romantic tale, "My Ex's Uncle Loves Me."

Pierre Paul Abutu gives a humorous, fascinating and dispassionate narration of the unique intimate and romantic events of his life from teenage to adolescence, and into the early stages of his adult life. This narration revolves around the lives, and relationships of sixteen ladies with whom he shared happy, intimate, eventful and evergreen moments of his life with. These love affairs occur in Pierre Abutu’s life, at his university, the Augustine Nnamani Campus, Agbani, in Enugu Campus of the Nigerian Law School, Akwa Ibom State and the Federal Capital Territory, Abuja. Due to his religious beliefs, personal convictions, personal principles, metaphysical and supernatural predictions and postulations, the media, intellectual and literary effects in his life, most of these affairs either ended abruptly or amicably. These love affairs also reveal the negative attitudes, traits and deceptive machinations of these girls and ladies. Even though certain unpleasant and resultant effects were never intended at any particular stage, or with any of these girls and ladies, one thing was very clear: each love affair was and would always be evergreen to Pierre Abutu.

Gary and Rowena didn't get along quite well initially in college. But thanks to their mutual friends, hanging out with each other became inevitable throughout the four years. Snide comments, sarcastic remarks, sparks... wait, what? After an electrifying night together at their graduation party and a 10-day vacation with friends, Rowena disappears and cuts off contact from everyone, leaving a heartbroken Gary. What happened? Where did she go? Will they ever see each other again? 5 years later questions remain unanswered. Until...

Candice crystal Falls: Bubbly, fun loving girl with a perfect family who cares about her so much as she is their single child. She can be very fiesty and sarcastic if you get on her bad side. About her looks she is a blonde beauty with grey eye's , luscious waist length blond hair and a milky white skin tone. Her height is 5'6 with long legs and her body is just like any model. Zachary Achile DeLuca: Italian Billionaire, Arrogant and cold are the perfect words to describe him, he doesn't give a shit to any person except his best friend nicholas. He's HOT & HANDSOME, you can say like a gift to mankind with 6'1 feet height , messy dark brown hair with dark blue almost black eye's. he and his best friend nicholas are known as the richest people on planet and won hottest bachelor award. If you try to mess with him, he will remove your existence from the planet. So you can say he holds grudges and sorry to forget he's a playboy. Girl's are desperate to get his attention. He get's what he want's and now he wants candice and he will get her either by easy way or the hard.

When one of the Fallen fall in love with a werewolf and have a special child that needed to be protected. Choosing to leave her pack behind Lizzy's Mother, Helena hid among the humans, in a small town. Lizzy's father loved them from a distance to keep them safe from those who may want to use Lizzy's gifts. Being the only female born to among the Fallen makes her special. Early on Helena noticed Lizzy develop gifts that were getting them noticed. When Helena is killed, Lizzy finds herself alone in the care system having deciding to shut down and stop talking she finds herself in the Mental hospital. Lizzy is alone until her wolf wakes and starts to talk to her. Finding this a lot to process Lizzy try's to ignore her wolf until she cant anymore. Arrow and Aries, twin Alpha heirs of Ruby Mountain Pack, always knew they would share a mate. What they weren't prepared for was the blunt and unfiltered Lizzy, who knows nothing about the world of the supernatural's she finds herself now thrown into. Being seriously stubborn and defiant Lizzy refuses to accept them as her mate's. Feeling confused about why her body keeps reacting to the two arrogant Alphas. Having a lot to deal with from the Pack's mean girls staking a claim on the Alphas who claim to be hers, to unintentionally putting herself in danger. Feeling overwhelmed with everything changing she finds herself wishing she was back in the tiny room back in the Hospital. Can the twin Alphas win the heart of their mate? Will the stubborn Lizzy give in and listen to her Mates? Or will she decide her own fate? All this on top of having to deal with her seriously sarcastic and horny wolf.

Bill is a nobody, a health inspector who’s not above taking a few dollars to overlook a restaurant’s mouse problem, and hated by nearly everyone except his long-suffering girlfriend. His nephew, Trent, isn’t much better: sexually and morally confused, he’s probably the worst teenage con artist on the East Coast. But today, these two losers harbor a sentient parasite with a sarcastic sense of humor and a ravenous appetite. As the parasite figures out how to control its new human hosts, the focus of its desires grows from delicious cheeseburgers and beer to something much darker and more dangerous.©️ Crystal Lake Publishing

They thought they were enemies. Fate made them mates. Joy Stone isn’t just the brainy, sarcastic queen of pranks—she’s a deadly Alpha hybrid in disguise. At her human university, no one suspects the quiet nerd is also the fiercest warrior of the Diamond Heart Pack. Until he walks in. Lex: infuriatingly gorgeous, maddeningly brilliant, and cocky enough to challenge her at every turn. He’s also the future Alpha of the Water Moon Pack, a notorious playboy whose charm breaks hearts almost as fast as his fists break bones—and now, her new rival for the top spot on campus. Their war starts with stolen notes, savage comebacks, and steamy glares that last too long. But one reckless kiss, one dark secret, and one blood-soaked rescue later… everything changes. They’re not just rivals. They’re mates. Now Joy has to choose: resist the pull—or give in to a bond that could expose everything she’s worked to hide. Enemies in the classroom. Lovers by fate. And in the end, only one will top the pack.

I'm an unloved daughter in the family. For me, being beaten and scolded has become a habit, being treated unfairly is no longer a strange thing. When I was eighteen, my twin sister pushed me into bed with a strange man. Five years later, because of her, I was once again traded. "If you want your son back, you have to marry him." With that one quote from my father, I had to replace my twin sister to marry a man I had never met, Marcus Johansen, a billionaire, and CEO of Citus, who was rumored to be unapproachable and tend to be violent. For the sake of my son, I accept. I thought my life would go dark again as the day of the wedding approached. But the unexpected happened, the man who was supposed to be difficult nearby suddenly looked at me affectionately, gently kissed me on the lips, and smiled sweetly. "Found you, from now on, you're my wife" ---- A cold and thoughtful girl with a traumatic past and a sly, humorous, self-loving man who hides behind an arrogant shell. Let's see what happens in their love life. Ernesta: He is my brother-in-law and also my son's father. How can I handle this mess? What should I do now? Marcus: It doesn't matter who she is, I just know she's my wife and the mother of my children. That's enough. Now don't bother me, I have to go coax my wife.

Matt had been gifted something that had only been of legend. something so beautiful and dangerous. he knows what has to be done is his destiny but will he handle the chaos that will ensue with this blessing, or will it all go to shit? *snippet* “What the fuck Chloe,” he ground out, “I'm not leaving until I have answers, you can't expect me to just let it go when you're thin as hell and covered in bruises,” He shouted in her face. “No, fuck you, you can't just come into my life, turn into that... that creature and expect to know my life story,” Chloe said stubbornly, folding her arms in front of her chest and turning away. “Im not asking for that, I just need to know who did this to you,” “You,” She turned on her hill, poking Matt in the chest, “Don't need to know anything,” She glared, Matt snatching her wrist and pulling her to him. “Why do you have to be so difficult?” he asked, his features softening. “Why do you have to be a mythical creature that's not supposed to exist,” “Ouch,” Niki muttered behind Matt in a sarcastic tone, folding her arms. “What?” Chloe snapped at her, regretting it instantly. “You're not supposed to exist either,” She said calmly. “What's that supposed to mean?” she asked, getting frustrated, her anger at the situation boiling inside her. “Its a long story, Matt can tell you,” Niki said, turning and walking away. “Come on, I'll explain everything,” Matt gestured for Chloe to follow, which she reluctantly did.