Sad Words Novels & Stories

I promised myself na I won't cry for him anymore. Para akong robot na nagtatrabaho, walang pakiramdam. I just feel numb from all the things that happened in my life. Why is my life so sad? Nagiging masaya lang ako sa konting panahon and after sa saya ay balik na naman sa pagiging miserable. I am not only referring to a guy, pati narin sa sitwasyon ko ngayon, wala akong matinong trabaho, di ako nakapagtapos sa pag aaral. I just don't know anymore, my baby is my only hope, siya lang ang makapagpapasaya sakin.

Patuloy ang pagtulo ng luha niya habang sapo ang mukha ko. "I love you, Zyska and I can't lose you because I love you so much." tuluyan siyang umiyak bago yumuko. "and I'm so, so sorry for making you cry. You making you feel like this." humikbi siya habang nakayuko. "Ito ang sinasabi ko. I can't promise not to make you cry and hurt because I know someday, gagawa ako ng mga bagay na ikakasakit mo. Na ikakasakit ko rin pero handa akong magpaliwag at manghingi ng tawad sa'yo ng paulit-ulit... I'm sorry, baby," he whispered while crying. "sorry. Sana mapatawad mo ako sa ginawa ko. I know it's hard to believe me right now, but that was all true. Patawarin mo ako."

"I'm coming again..." I pumped a little more until we both reached the peak. "I love you so much," I uttered words from the bottom of my heart. You were mindin' your life and I was mindin' mine too Lady, when you looked my way I had a strange sensation and darlin', that's when I knew That it's sad to belong to someone else When the right one comes along Yes, it's sad to belong to someone else When the right one comes along The song says it all.

So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink I could be the man who grows old with you I smile sadly as I ended my favorite song. Hindi naman talaga ako super sad today. Wala lang, it's just that I feel so sentimental when I woke up this morning. It's been week since that incident in his office. At first, I feel so sad that I won't be able to see him again but eventually naging okay din naman ako. Sabi nga nila wala namang permanente sa mundong ito so , this pain that I'm feeling right now, mawawala din ito.

i added with sobs. Napaluhod ako at patuloy na hinihimas ang lapida ng aking anak. I drowned myself in this sorrow, sadness and pain until the pain turn numb. I drowned myself in my tears until they completely drained. Gustohin ko magpakatatag pero saan ako huhugot ng lakas? Bakit sa kabila nangyayari sa buhay ko bakit nanatiling nakatayo pa rin ako sa mundong ito.

Isang nakamamatay na sakit ang ipinaramdam ng simpleng mga salitang lumalabas sa kaniyang bibig. Ilang sandali pa'y bigla akong makaramdam ng pagsipa ng anak ko sa aking sinapupunan habang patuloy pa rin ako sa paghagulgol. Oh God! I'm so sorry, my baby! I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have let you feel this kind of pain.

Minsan lang ako nagsasalita ng ingles dahil hindi ko yun nakasanayan pero naramdaman ko na mas humigpit pa ang yakap niya sa akin. Siguro, malungkot ang naging buhay ni Vander. Walang kaibigan at laging kinatatakutan. Kung may kaibigan man siya na yung pangalan ay Josh, sapat ba siya para hindi naging malungkot si Vander? Bakit pakiramdam ko ay buong buhay na nag-iisa at malungkot si Vander? Bakit pakiramdam ko, ito ang totoong Vander? "—oh shit, I'm sorry!"

Pero yung sakit na binibigay niya… walang gamot na makakapagpagaling doon. Siya ang asawa ko. Siya ang mundo ko. Pero siya rin… ang taong walang awang nananakit sa akin. “The worst kind of sickness isn’t the one that hurts your body. It’s the one that slowly kills your heart because the person you love… doesn’t even care if you live or die.”

Pero sana maisip mo kung gaano ko gustong humingi ng tawad. I am so sorry for being a coward. Sorry because I am not strong enough. I am so sorry because I need to leave you. I am so sorry because we need to part ways. I am so sorry because I am not perfect. I am so sorry that we ended up like this. Sorry for everything. Sana kung magtagpo man tayo sa susunod ay tingnan mo pa rin ako. Kahit isang segundo lang. Pero hindi kita masisisi kung kakalimutan mo na ako ng tuluyan. I will surely accept everything.

“Hi, Vivi.. I just wanted to ask you if we can meetup soon? I really wanna apologize at hindi ako makatulog dala na rin ng ginawa ko sa’yo… My conscience is killing me, man.. I’m really sorry for not asking and waiting or listening to your side of the story yesterday ::(( …” Mensahe nito na may sad emoji pa sa dulo. I immediately smile as I felt his genuine apology, ngunit alam ko naman na dapat eh agad ko siyang kinausap agad.