Novel & Cerita Why Do I Cry So Easily

I always hear things like this but I just can’t really help but to feel sad about it. Tahimik lang akong tumalikod bago ako nagtungo pabalik sa aking kwarto. Hindi ko na namalayan pa ang luha mula sa aking mga mata. I was always like this. Always been an annoying cry baby that everyone thinks can’t cry. I always have an strong personality in the internet but easily get hurts with those comments I read. Pinalis ko lang ang luha nang matapos akong umiyak. Sinindi ko na lang din ang tv at nanood sa n*****x habang nilalantakan na lang ang pagkain dito sa ref dahil hindi ko na gustong bumaba.

I'm conscious but unconsciously tears fell from my eyes. I couldn't help it and I want too cool down so I decided to take a shower. ***** Nahimasmasan ako ng konti. I cry it all under the shower. I took my pain reliever before laying to bed. Nagbitaw ako ng malalim na hinga before I closed my eyes. Still, after an hour of crying under the shower umiyak pa rin ako ngayon. I wiped my tears. Sinubsob ko ang sarili ko sa kumot. I know I am a cry-baby but it’s really driving me crazy.

Ngayon ko lang napansin ang kaibahan nila. YUNA AYANNE I KNOW IT'S rude to walk-out in that situation. Other's are crying while me, here in hospital's veranda enjoying the view. I hate tears. I hate it because I've already done that shit. And mind you, it doesn't grant me. Nothing's happen. Crying is just a waste of water in our body. Also time. And even strength. It. Is. Useless. Maraming tao ang nagsidaan sa aking likuran. I crossed my arms and closed my eyes to feel the freshness of the air.

Bullshit. Nagmadali akong umalis at umuwi, trying to stop my pain, my tears from coming out. Kailanman, hindi ako umiyak. Kayang-kaya kong pigilan ang mga luha ko. No one will see me cry, no one will see me weak. I know it's good for the soul, but crying for me means you're letting someone make you feel vulnerable. I won't give anyone satisfaction by hurting me. They don't deserve that kind of joy. They don't deserve to see me cry.

Kapag kailangan lang niya ako, saka ako nagkakaroon ng halaga sa kanya. While I closed my eyes, a single tear suddenly dropped on my pillow, and I immediately wiped it out. Why the hell was I crying for such a thing?

Pero ang sakit ng loob ko. Napakagat ako sa aking labi at pinunasan ang luhang umagos. Ang tigas ng puso ko. Nanigas dahil sa nalaman at sa napagtanto. Ngunit ang mga mata ko...they keep on letting out tears. Kaya patuloy ko rin silang inaalis. May humawak sa braso ko kaya napabaling ako kung sino iyon. I saw how his eyes turned soft when he saw me crying.

“That’s embarrassing, mom.” She continued to talk to me even though I barely answered her. I don’t know what to say. “I…” “You don’t need to talk if you don’t want to.” “Why are you getting patient with me?” “Because that’s what I lacked.” For an unknown reason, tears were suddenly streaming down my face. I tried my best to stifle my sobs because I don't want her to think that there is something wrong with me. There’s nothing wrong with me really. I’m just happy.

Natahimik ako sa sinabi nito. Parang bumalik sa aking ala-ala ang nakaraan. Ang hirap sa panganganak, hirap sa pag aalaga sa kanila lalo na sa pagpapatahan kapag may nararamdaman silang masakit at hindi ko naman matukoy kung ano yun. “Hey, why are you crying?” Napapahid ako ng luha sa aking pisngi. Hindi ko namalayan na tumutulo na pala ang luha ko.

Hindi na ako nag-abala pang magpalit at basta nalang dumapa sa unang ko. After a minute of burying my face on my pillow, naramdaman ko ang pag-alpas ng mga luha sa mata ko. Hindi ko namalayan na umiiyak na pala ako dahil hindi ko naman naririnig. It's always been like this. No one knows how I cry, even my parents and my sisters. I'm always quiet when I cry. Ayaw kong makaistorbo kaya sinasarili ko ang problema at pag-uwi.

I ended up crying my eyes out but showed no emotion. What has just happened?