I Am Not Okay With This Novels & Stories

Parang hindi maganda ang kutob ko. *******

Medyo kinakabahan dahil ibang ekspresyon na ang kanyang pinapakita. Mapait siyang napatawa dahil sa narinig. He looks fine naman talaga! Kung hindi ko lang nga siya makikitang ganito, masasabi kong masaya na siya at kontento. Base palang sa kasuotan niya at sa estado ng buhay niya, hindi na ako magtataka pa. "Hindi. You're wrong. Hindi ako okay, at hindi nagiging okay." napa-iwas naman ako sa sinabi niyang iyon!

Hayaan ko na kang din tulad nung nakaraan. "Indie," But I just can't seem to relax dahil harap-harapan ko pang nakita, narinig ko, eh. It's okay to take someone's photo lalo na if they'll not use it in any bad circumstances. And there's nothing important about me, so why take photos of me?

"Im not okay, My marriage is not okay, My family is not okay, Even my brain is not okay!" Tinakpan ko ang aking mukha gamit ang mga palad ko at saka umiyak ng umiyak. I know this marriage won't last any longer. Alam kong sa huli ay masasayang lahat ng sakripisyo ko. -----------------------------------‐------------

Para maikalma ang sarili ay pinili ko ngayon dito sa harap ng dagat para makapag isip isip Inikot ko ang aking paningin sa aking paligid biglang may dumating. “ How are you?” Jean asked me. “Not okay. I am not ok even though you're here. There is a sudden emotion that I am feeling right now Jean. Hindi ko alam kung dapat ba akong matuwa which is masaya naman ako pero that pain is coming back. Hindi mo alam ang pakiramdam ng iniwan with an email me for me. I am trying to contact you. Sumubok ako. Am I bad for wanting you to stay because isa ka sa mga taong mahalaga sa akin?” I asked and continued,

Tahimik siya ng ilang segundo, saka muling nagsalita. “Because I believe people need someone who won’t leave even when they’re not okay.” Tumaas ang luha ko sa mata, pero hindi ito bumagsak. Napapikit ako, huminga ng malalim. “I’m not used to that,” bulong ko. “Sanay kang iniiwan?” “Higit pa roon,” bulong ko muli. “Sanay akong pinipilit maging okay kahit hindi naman.”

iyon ang hindi ko matatanggap kaya sobra akong kinabahan. Hopefully she won't reject me. Not again.

“Kasalanan mo!” “Stop struggling then. It's sexy when you're acting stubborn but it's getting frustrating, baby.” Tumahimik ka, gago! Nagririgodon na ‘tong puso ko! Leche! “This is nothing compared to my bad days.” “Same goes with me but I will always have to deal with you in that case. Bad or good, I'm going to deal with that.”

Kailan ba nagsimula ang ganitong damdamin ko sa kanya eh hindi ko naman siya gusto? Oh, my, this is not good. I don't want to like him because he is unlikable. . C.m. louden

And I don't want that to happen. ***